10 November:
I went to school as usual, came home,had lunch,came online, went on facebook, had a one hour nap.
Everything went on as usual. Just like any other mundane Tuesdays......
The only thing I forgot about today... is that...
Today, is my father's birthday.
It struck me so hard when I received a message from him...
It said:
Moi,there is something that you haven't said to me.
I was still in a very unclear state and I was not aware that today is his birthday as I have lost track of dates since I don't have to do anything in school... I glanced on the date on my cell, and felt as if someone plunged a dagger into my heart... and to top it off.. it was raining... and every sound of thunder hurt me even more. It was as if I was wounded in a cold,wet world alone... hurting so badly even though I look fine on the outside.
But I put aside everything... and gathered some courage to write him this:
Happy Birthday papa!
You're not 44, you're eighteen with 26 years experience!
Many happy returns :D
Love ya.
As the text message shows, I was trying to be as cool and calm as possible. And I think I did a pretty good job...
He replied:
Just a greeting from you would do wonders for me... TQ for making me happy! Love you too.
Me: =D
Pa: If you won't forget your friend's b'day, pls remember mine cos I'm your buddy too!
*wipes tears while curling up under my blanket*
Me: Sorry >.<
Lost track of dates
Pa: I believe u r keeping the best 4 last!
Me: What? -.-
Pa: it's alright moi, I m the happiest man alive!
At that point... vivid memories came to life. It was more like flashes of memory.. about him saying how proud he is to have me as his daughter, about how he loves it when I go Shakespeare and talk like an adult, and about how he praises me when I give my views on life as if I've been through life more than him.. and how I stand up for myself.
Despite being so mean and disrespectful to him, he still loves me.
And says he's the happiest man alive..even though I forgot his birthday.
No one can ever imagine how I'm feeling right this moment..
Alone,looking horrible,hurt,cold... It's like a thousand feelings mixed together and you just can't find a suitable word just to describe it.
I haven't talked to my father face-to-face yet. He wasn't at home while I was suffering silently in my room [Thank goodness.]
He'll be back in less than half an hour. And I hope my mom got a cake for him just as I requested.
I wish upon a thousand shooting stars... that my dad will truly be happy...
As I could feel vibes of sadness through our text conversation....
I feel a little bit relieved after expressing my feelings through words...
I guess blogging really does help in a way..
*catch a falling star and put it in your pocket, save it for a rainy day...*
Happy Birthday,Pa!
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
Thursday, November 5, 2009
October ♥
Had exams from 7 Oct-26 Oct.
Such long exhausting and excruciating weeks >.<
9 Oct-11 Oct :
Even though I was in the midst of exams I needed to attend this camp. Confirmation Camp.
I was very reluctant at first to leave home and when i was having add maths on the 12th [one of my weakest subjects].
I thought this camp was gonna be like the other lame boring camps.
I reached the domus almost an hour late. But everyone seemed cool with it, so I couldn't be bothered. My roommates: Jeanna,Joelyn,Samantha then leaded me to our room, and left me in charge of the room keys. I thought: 'Great, I've got responsibilities the moment I reach camp.' I was very negative and sacarstic. =.=
We then hurried down to the hall to meet our facilitator. Great,another holy ass to talk to us about being holy for the next 2 days He's Martin Jalleh btw.
I changed my perspective completely after he started talking. He isn't like those holy dudes who cannot stop preaching.
He's cool and hip despite his age. He's very well updated and know lots about young people nowadays. He's hellla funny. He managed to make me smile wholeheartedly.[which isn't an easy task when I'm in a mood like this] =)
I spent the next few days growing more in love with the camp, the facilitator and my friends. It's odd how we get along just well.
I learnt how to appreciate things, people,God and my parents. ^-^
Had a great camp. It's a real regret for me for not bringing my camera to capture moments of memories. I guess I'll only get to remember this camp through my memory, I hope it wouldn't fade away (:
****************************************
*skip
*skip
*skip
28 Oct:
Went to Gurney plaza with mom to get my confirmation shoes v^.^v
29 Oct:
Was a rather busy day for me.
It started with school, and then got home, changed. Brought Juyi out for her little surprise.
I brought her along to see me test my confirmation dress! hmm, gown actually.
As no one has ever seen me wear a dress casually, this indeed is a surprise for her!
As soon as we arrived at Crystal Brides near megamall, I was asked to try on the gown. And of course, Juyi was surprised =] We even took a couple of pics together.
After the fitting, dad drove Juyi back to her father's office. Then I went home and had a bath.
At about 6.20 pm, Mom,Nat and I picked Dennis up from his granny's place and drove to Auto City. We reached there at 7.00 pm. We were there to celebrate Wen Cong's birthday. =)
When we reached, Cong was outside Seoul Garden waiting for Dennis and I, he shook hands with Dennis. But Cong and I hugged ;P
We went inside S.G and waited for Hor Chun. So the people who celebrated mbf's birthday were: Yuan Chen,Dennis,Hor Chun,birthdayboy and I.
5 people. A whole lot of noise LOL. We joked, we had fun. I felt GREAT that day =] Birthday boy here made me laugh and smile. I was sooooo happy, felt comfortable around these people.
Birthday boyyyy **
Dennis looking like a total retard xD
Dennis and Hor Chun
mbf and Dennis
All in ^^
We obviously had fun =] I'm glad b'day boy was happy. He better be. xD
Awesome October ♥
Such long exhausting and excruciating weeks >.<
9 Oct-11 Oct :
Even though I was in the midst of exams I needed to attend this camp. Confirmation Camp.
I was very reluctant at first to leave home and when i was having add maths on the 12th [one of my weakest subjects].
I thought this camp was gonna be like the other lame boring camps.
I reached the domus almost an hour late. But everyone seemed cool with it, so I couldn't be bothered. My roommates: Jeanna,Joelyn,Samantha then leaded me to our room, and left me in charge of the room keys. I thought: 'Great, I've got responsibilities the moment I reach camp.' I was very negative and sacarstic. =.=
We then hurried down to the hall to meet our facilitator. Great,another holy ass to talk to us about being holy for the next 2 days He's Martin Jalleh btw.
I changed my perspective completely after he started talking. He isn't like those holy dudes who cannot stop preaching.
He's cool and hip despite his age. He's very well updated and know lots about young people nowadays. He's hellla funny. He managed to make me smile wholeheartedly.[which isn't an easy task when I'm in a mood like this] =)
I spent the next few days growing more in love with the camp, the facilitator and my friends. It's odd how we get along just well.
I learnt how to appreciate things, people,God and my parents. ^-^
Had a great camp. It's a real regret for me for not bringing my camera to capture moments of memories. I guess I'll only get to remember this camp through my memory, I hope it wouldn't fade away (:
****************************************
*skip
*skip
*skip
28 Oct:
Went to Gurney plaza with mom to get my confirmation shoes v^.^v
29 Oct:
Was a rather busy day for me.
It started with school, and then got home, changed. Brought Juyi out for her little surprise.
I brought her along to see me test my confirmation dress! hmm, gown actually.
As no one has ever seen me wear a dress casually, this indeed is a surprise for her!
As soon as we arrived at Crystal Brides near megamall, I was asked to try on the gown. And of course, Juyi was surprised =] We even took a couple of pics together.
After the fitting, dad drove Juyi back to her father's office. Then I went home and had a bath.
At about 6.20 pm, Mom,Nat and I picked Dennis up from his granny's place and drove to Auto City. We reached there at 7.00 pm. We were there to celebrate Wen Cong's birthday. =)
When we reached, Cong was outside Seoul Garden waiting for Dennis and I, he shook hands with Dennis. But Cong and I hugged ;P
We went inside S.G and waited for Hor Chun. So the people who celebrated mbf's birthday were: Yuan Chen,Dennis,Hor Chun,birthdayboy and I.
5 people. A whole lot of noise LOL. We joked, we had fun. I felt GREAT that day =] Birthday boy here made me laugh and smile. I was sooooo happy, felt comfortable around these people.
Birthday boyyyy **
Dennis looking like a total retard xD
Dennis and Hor Chun
mbf and Dennis
All in ^^We obviously had fun =] I'm glad b'day boy was happy. He better be. xD
Awesome October ♥
Photographs are the best time capsules
A lot has been going on since August. Mostly outings =]
September highlights:-
20 Sept:
My family[Grandparents,parents,sisters] and I made a trip down to Genting.
We had a fun drive down there because we had lots of time to catch up and condemn the government. xD [we aren't the most patriotic citizens]
*****
So we went seperate ways when we reached Genting.
Had fun at the theme park. Got lost. Dad came to the rescue and 'escorted' Natalie and I to Genting Hotel for an ALL-YOU-CAN-EAT buffet. [forgot the restaurant's name]
Had a great dinner with the family ♥
*The almost complete family*
*The complete family*
After the buffet and at about 10.30 pm there was a fireworks display. It was a really magical and wonderful display. An eye-opener ^-^
After the fireworks display,we left for Klang [my uncle's place].
I opened the sun-roof on my dad's car and admired the stars way high up, and it's true that you get a clearer view of stars at a higher altitude. Too bad i didn't have my binoculars with me.
As I was laying back watching the stars, I dozed off to a deep slumber. Only to be woken up by my phone. Sean called. at 1.00 am -.- Sean was sleeping over at KC's and they were prank-calling people,and unfortunately, I was their first 'victim'. I caught Dad glancing at his rear-view mirror a couple of times to check on me. He didn't ask me who was on the phone for I looked truly annoyed. I reached my uncle's place at 2.30 am. Uncle and aunty welcomed us warmly eventhough they looked fatigue. I very much appreciate the trouble uncle and aunty took to wait for us till we arrived.
We then retired for the night.
*****
21 Sept:
Had Bak Kut Teh for breakfast.
After that Aunty, Ming [cousin, 13 yrs old], Mom and I went hunting for clothes. We spent 2 hours+ at the boutique. I caused the most damage, Mom bought RM 2ooo+ worth of clothes for me, felt very bad then =( But she just shrugged and said, you're gonna wear it anyways, you can save some for Xmas or CNY.
Talk about willing to spend for her daughter ♥
We then went back to thier place and waited for around 15 minutes for them to pack their luggages.
We then started our journey towards our next destination.
The journey was ok.. until we reached the hill foot.
As we started driving up the hill, I felt nauseous. The road is too winding and it's a bloody long stretch if you ask me -.-
It took us almost 2 hours just to reach that God forsaken place. By the time I reached there, the excitement was all drained away by the long journey up hill.
But it only took me 10 minutes of fresh air to regain the thrill of being in some place new and unfamiliar.
That place really gave me a peace of mind.And I loved it. As it was pass dusk when we reached there, the air was cool and inviting. Dad says sometimes unplanned trips are the most fun. And I agree. We never thought about putting up a night here, but as it's dangerous to travel downhill at night and the fact that we've just reached, we decided to put up a night. v^^v
We had dinner right after we checked in our apartment. We were practically starving, we weren't prepared for the long journey uphill.
We then had a nice long leisure stroll after dinner. It was so cooling and refreshing, unlike Genting,this place isn't that well developed. It's so serene and the streets are so clean. [I've never seen a part of M'sia being so clean -.-].
oh and you might be thinking to yourself now : Where the hell is this place?!
hehe, It's FRASER'S HILL.
We then drove back to our apartment and lazed around. oh yeah! we bought some junkfood and fruits on the way back. xD As my family members were joyfully chatting away and enjoying the tidbits. I was alone in my room.. I climbed onto a 4 1/2 foot platform and gazed out through the window with deep thoughts. I was truly happy and my heart was at peace. This outing really "rescued" me from the hustle and bustle of city-town life. As the sound of laughter and joy of my family members echo in my head, I wanted their voices to ring in my mind and heart for years to come when I think about them till.I.draw.my.last.breath.
It's funny how little gestures or things people do reminds us of our bitter sweet past. Both overwhelming and heartbreaking. Joy if we gain, pain if we lose.
After a few short minutes, I slid under my covers and shut my eyes with a vague smile on my face.
*The platform*
*****
22 Sept:
The real fun begins.
Our day starts with breakfast, then horse-riding, followed by archery then a trip to the waterfall,then a visit to the Sultan's house. [didn't really give a damn which sultan's house it was]
Then we packed our bags and headed downhill back to civilisation.
I let the pictures do the talking.
From the left-Natalie, Ming& dog, Jude,Rachel,me,Mom
From the left:Dad,Nat,Ming,Jude,me,Aunty
Grandma and Grandpa
Mom and Rachel on a horse
Archery ^^
The so called 'waterfall'
The sultan's place
That's a wrap for our trip to Fraser's Hill. I didn't want to go home... It's a really nice place ♥
Anyhow, we still had to go. We left Fraser's Hill at 4.00 pm. Goodness, I missed that place the moment we got back on the highway. I forgot how hot M'sia really is. I spent too much time in Genting and Fraser's Hill.
Aunty and Uncle spent a couple of nights at our place before going back to Klang.
That pretty much summarizes everything.
☺☻♡ ♥
September highlights:-
20 Sept:
My family[Grandparents,parents,sisters] and I made a trip down to Genting.
We had a fun drive down there because we had lots of time to catch up and condemn the government. xD [we aren't the most patriotic citizens]
*****
So we went seperate ways when we reached Genting.
Had fun at the theme park. Got lost. Dad came to the rescue and 'escorted' Natalie and I to Genting Hotel for an ALL-YOU-CAN-EAT buffet. [forgot the restaurant's name]
Had a great dinner with the family ♥
*The almost complete family*
*The complete family*After the buffet and at about 10.30 pm there was a fireworks display. It was a really magical and wonderful display. An eye-opener ^-^
After the fireworks display,we left for Klang [my uncle's place].
I opened the sun-roof on my dad's car and admired the stars way high up, and it's true that you get a clearer view of stars at a higher altitude. Too bad i didn't have my binoculars with me.
As I was laying back watching the stars, I dozed off to a deep slumber. Only to be woken up by my phone. Sean called. at 1.00 am -.- Sean was sleeping over at KC's and they were prank-calling people,and unfortunately, I was their first 'victim'. I caught Dad glancing at his rear-view mirror a couple of times to check on me. He didn't ask me who was on the phone for I looked truly annoyed. I reached my uncle's place at 2.30 am. Uncle and aunty welcomed us warmly eventhough they looked fatigue. I very much appreciate the trouble uncle and aunty took to wait for us till we arrived.
We then retired for the night.
*****
21 Sept:
Had Bak Kut Teh for breakfast.
After that Aunty, Ming [cousin, 13 yrs old], Mom and I went hunting for clothes. We spent 2 hours+ at the boutique. I caused the most damage, Mom bought RM 2ooo+ worth of clothes for me, felt very bad then =( But she just shrugged and said, you're gonna wear it anyways, you can save some for Xmas or CNY.
Talk about willing to spend for her daughter ♥
We then went back to thier place and waited for around 15 minutes for them to pack their luggages.
We then started our journey towards our next destination.
The journey was ok.. until we reached the hill foot.
As we started driving up the hill, I felt nauseous. The road is too winding and it's a bloody long stretch if you ask me -.-
It took us almost 2 hours just to reach that God forsaken place. By the time I reached there, the excitement was all drained away by the long journey up hill.
But it only took me 10 minutes of fresh air to regain the thrill of being in some place new and unfamiliar.
That place really gave me a peace of mind.And I loved it. As it was pass dusk when we reached there, the air was cool and inviting. Dad says sometimes unplanned trips are the most fun. And I agree. We never thought about putting up a night here, but as it's dangerous to travel downhill at night and the fact that we've just reached, we decided to put up a night. v^^v
We had dinner right after we checked in our apartment. We were practically starving, we weren't prepared for the long journey uphill.
We then had a nice long leisure stroll after dinner. It was so cooling and refreshing, unlike Genting,this place isn't that well developed. It's so serene and the streets are so clean. [I've never seen a part of M'sia being so clean -.-].
oh and you might be thinking to yourself now : Where the hell is this place?!
hehe, It's FRASER'S HILL.
We then drove back to our apartment and lazed around. oh yeah! we bought some junkfood and fruits on the way back. xD As my family members were joyfully chatting away and enjoying the tidbits. I was alone in my room.. I climbed onto a 4 1/2 foot platform and gazed out through the window with deep thoughts. I was truly happy and my heart was at peace. This outing really "rescued" me from the hustle and bustle of city-town life. As the sound of laughter and joy of my family members echo in my head, I wanted their voices to ring in my mind and heart for years to come when I think about them till.I.draw.my.last.breath.
It's funny how little gestures or things people do reminds us of our bitter sweet past. Both overwhelming and heartbreaking. Joy if we gain, pain if we lose.
After a few short minutes, I slid under my covers and shut my eyes with a vague smile on my face.
*The platform******
22 Sept:
The real fun begins.
Our day starts with breakfast, then horse-riding, followed by archery then a trip to the waterfall,then a visit to the Sultan's house. [didn't really give a damn which sultan's house it was]
Then we packed our bags and headed downhill back to civilisation.
I let the pictures do the talking.
From the left-Natalie, Ming& dog, Jude,Rachel,me,Mom
From the left:Dad,Nat,Ming,Jude,me,AuntyGrandma and Grandpa
Mom and Rachel on a horse
Archery ^^
The so called 'waterfall'
The sultan's placeThat's a wrap for our trip to Fraser's Hill. I didn't want to go home... It's a really nice place ♥
Anyhow, we still had to go. We left Fraser's Hill at 4.00 pm. Goodness, I missed that place the moment we got back on the highway. I forgot how hot M'sia really is. I spent too much time in Genting and Fraser's Hill.
Aunty and Uncle spent a couple of nights at our place before going back to Klang.
That pretty much summarizes everything.
☺☻♡ ♥
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